The Custard Bowl

Those of you who have been part of the Crabbysbeach blogging community for a while may have noticed that my own blog, The Custard Bowl, dried up a while back. It was my first blogging experience and a rewarding one in many ways. While I know that it takes a long-term commitment to see rewards on a blog, I also learned over those first few months the importance of writing in a niche, and that is where my future blogging efforts are heading.

The other reason why The Custard Bowl has gone back in the cupboard is because of MiMi. I had been using my blog here to highlight some great work by other writers over on Squidoo, and when I was invited to do the same as part of the Squidoo Lens Reviews blogging team I wanted to make sure I was giving that blog my best. Some people manage two blogs on one topic very nicely, thank you. I’m not one of them. Not at this point in time.

Did I make the right decision? You bet I did! Here are just some of the things I have learned from being part of MiMi’s Squidoo Lens Reviews team:

• Do something that scares you! Yes, it scared me when I got the email from MiMi. Surely some mistake? No, it was written directly to me. Ah, but I wasn’t up to the challenge, came the immediate thought. I risked public failure and I risked letting down people who trusted me. Am I glad that I didn’t let the fear get the best of me!
• Trust the instincts of people you respect. If there is one thing I’ve noticed about MiMi, it is that she earns respect wherever she goes. Her good opinion means something. And her invitation to write for her own blog, into which she has put so much consistent effort, meant she believed in her team. She was willing to take a chance on us.
• Work with people you admire. Sure, we would all love to work with people we admire, right? But there’s a risk involved. We tend to admire those who are talented, who are accomplished, who are… yes, better than us. And that means we risk looking small beside them. Doesn’t sound good. But I discovered that this has three positive consequences. 1: You have to raise your game. 2: You get some fantastic role models to learn from. 3: You complement one another.
• Be accountable. This one’s a biggie. Accountability is powerful. However, it can be hard to answer to yourself. Discipline is like a muscle — it has to be built up. Some have already developed it. (Some around here even blogged just about every day for 30 days, which is an impressive achievement.) Beginning bloggers, however, can have some issues with self-discipline. Writing for someone else’s blog and being part of a team works, because you risk letting more than just yourself down.
• Have a deadline. This goes hand in hand with the above, and makes it double-powerful. MiMi was smart. She assigned us each a day. If I don’t publish my blog post for a Monday, the whole week has a hole in it. That’s not about self-importance, it’s about contribution. I know what I need to do and when I need to do it in order to prevent there being a failed link in our chain of team posts.
• There is an ‘I’ in ‘team’. I’ve always been an independent spirit. Team blogging sounded like it wouldn’t suit me. Again, I’ll say it: MiMi is one smart lady. She didn’t try to regiment this, or to impose a single identity on the 5 daily writers and on the contributors. She knew that 5 (or more) independent spirits would be more interesting. I’ve noticed that over the last few weeks we have begun to develop our own ‘brands’ in terms of what we write about and how we present it. I love that, because it has developed naturally, from our own individual passions.
• It’s a good feeling to have support. That might be stating the obvious. But remember, I’m not a ‘team’ person. I’m not made that way. I also know that Squidoo Lens Reviews was never intended to be a mutual admiration society, and the focus is always on the greater community. Even so, it sure feels good to know that MiMi and often one or more of the team will take the time to read my review, visit the lens, and leave a thoughtful comment. I notice. And I appreciate it.

MiMi and those who write for her blog have taught me so much and I am delighted to be part of Squidoo Lens Reviews. To me, it really is something special, and I know the other writers and contributors feel the same way.

The best thing about the lessons I have learned there is that they have provided insights that will not only help me in my writing, but in life as a whole. And that’s why I wanted to share them here with you too.

Well, yes, I’ve been the only little green pear in town for a while now and that has certain advantages. For those who don’t know, that pear represents my only successful experience with the perplexing craft of crochet. (Some might be tempted to speculate that this is because a pear has no arms or legs.) However, when it comes to blogging, I’ve been looking for a while for a more human face to present to the world. Without going the extra step and actually using a photo of the real me, that is.

I have the incredible good fortune to have a talented graphic designer as a friend. As some already may know, Cynthia is one half of the wonderful design duo ‘arncyn’ (which is also the name of her Squidoo persona). In addition to her Squiddabling blog, you can find Cynthia on Zazzle where she is a well-respected pro-seller with one of her designs featured on the front page. Or jump straight to Poptastic Tees to see the full range of t-shirt designs from the 80s to Twilight and the Winter Olympic Games.

I’ve long admired her designs (just one example below) and I can’t tell you how delighted I am with the avatar. At last I can unite my non-Squidoo personalities under one identity.

As for the pear, it won’t be vanishing for good. I’m keeping that one for Squidoo.

Tweety Pies Keds Shoe by arncyn

When life is getting you down, it is tempting to cheer yourself up by being less responsible. Of course, we don’t think about it in those terms at the time. Rather, we like to think we are being ‘good’ to ourselves. We let ourselves off doing housework, forget the healthy eating plans in favour of our most sinful comfort foods, lie around doing not very much at all. If we blog, we give ourselves some time off. Anything that looks like work is put on hold until we begin feeling better.

What we don’t always figure out is that being easy on ourselves can be unhelpful. Slouching around in pajamas can feel like a treat at first, but if you are anything like me you might find your productivity starts to drop and you have a tough time setting your mind to serious matters when you are dressed for bed. Leaving things lying around the house isn’t a well-deserved break, even if that’s how you justify it. It’s just storing up the work for later, and soon starts to weigh you down. All those sweet treats we indulge in have a similar effect.

I was on Gretchen Rubin’s blog, The Happiness Project. Now the author of a number one bestseller on the topic, Gretchen has made happiness a central focus of her life. Yet some of her tips seem trivial at first. For me, ‘make your bed’ was certainly not the magic answer I was scouring her words for. But you know what? I went into the bedroom and the bed was a rumpled mess. So I straightened it all out, took the clothes (his, not mine!) from the floor and folded them neatly, and yes I did feel a tiny bit better. Then I put the laundry on, and did the dishes, and opened the blind to let the sunshine in. Suddenly I was making a phone call I had been putting off, and feeling in a much better mood.

I heard once, although I don’t remember where, that you are never standing still in life. You are either climbing or sliding. If you feel like you’ve been sliding, and you can see the signs all around you, take one small action. And, if you can, then take another. Before you know it, you will be climbing once again.

Now, genealogy can be an expensive hobby, let me be clear on that. Especially if you hope to go back to the time of the Mayflower or earlier. However, there is more than one way to enjoy your connection to the past. All it takes is a willingness to listen to those in your family who have tales to tell. Even if the old folk are now all gone, and you are beginning to feel like ‘the old folk’ yourself, your own memories can reawaken days long past and breathe life into characters who have not walked on this Earth in many a year now.

For instance, you may know someone who lived through the Second World War, or remember the tales of a parent or grandparent who was alive at that time. It’s easy to ignore how fascinating your own life’s events and those of your parents are to later generations. That’s why I am following with interest all the wonderful true-life family history stories being produced by Delia, an artist and US citizen who was born in Berlin in 1943. Admittedly, her tales are more exciting than most. After all, she is actually a Baroness who has lived in a castle. She was baptized in the famous Kaiser Wilhelm Church which was soon after destroyed (you can see its remains in central Berlin today). She chronicles both this and her childhood years in the Bavarian Alps, and also presents My Life Story in a Suitcase. As if this were not enough, for those who haven’t yet encountered Delia, it is her face that you see on the Sunmaid Raisin box. Seriously. I told you she was an interesting lady!

Even if your own family background seems less eventful, if you are time rich but cash poor, you have the perfect opportunity to do your own detective work into the past. There is now so much you can find out online, both through free online resource and by making contact with relatives engaged in research into another branch of the same family. My own genealogy guide, How To Do Your Family History For Free, has some advice to get you started!

I don’t know about you but I stopped watching the News a long time ago. I can’t bear all that doom and gloom. It’s way too infectious. I’d rather spend my time seeking out the good things that have happened.

I love it when I find something unexpected on my online wandering, something that stops me in my tracks and presents me with new ways of seeing. Part of the pleasure of following links left by others is that you never know quite when you will find something that will put a smile on your face or leave you with the warm fuzzies.

It was one such delightful surprise that first introduced me to one of the loveliest people I know on Squidoo. 5 Short Films That Will Make You See Life in a New Light. You should know by now that I’m a sucker for a title like that, even though I didn’t know anything about the person who created it beyond the fact that she too was going for Giant over on Squidoo.

I discovered, exactly as promised, 5 wonderful and original short films that were at once surprising and uplifting. Anyone who is familiar with the work of Cynthia (arncyn) will know she consistently turns out lenses that are both full of unique content and beautifully packaged. This one is no exception, and I love her selection of films, none of which I had seen or even heard of before.

For those with sharp eyes and good memories, yes indeed, Cynthia was recently kind enough to feature my vintage travel posters in her blog here. But this isn’t a ‘returning the favour’ post. I’ve been longing for a chance to mention what has to be one of my all-time favourite lenses on Squidoo. It’s even better that it was one that introduced me to a new friend.

If I’ve been quiet lately, it’s because I’m not my usual self. I don’t know whose self I am. If I did, I’d be grabbing a chunky black marker and scrawling ‘return to sender’.

None of the things that usually capture my interest seem appealing at the moment. Other than food, of course. Ah yes, all that is sweet, sticky and sinful. Comfort food with a capital C.

So today I’m going to excuse myself with a short but hopefully sweet post, and send you off to feast your eyes on the delicious edibles that others have written about.

First up, my Belgian friend Dom, who is from the land of fine chocolate. One of her newest offerings on Squidoo is this wonderful Easy Coffee Cake Recipe. She says she’s “probably one of the worst cooks out there.” Somehow I doubt her on this, but in any case easy recipes are right up my alley, especially when they feed my own coffee cake obsession.

As if that wasn’t sinful enough, here’s a page to make even the most iron-willed dieter weep. Brenda claims to have invented the Best Ever Chocolate Fondue Recipe. Looking (drooling) at her recipe and all those wicked chocolatey pictures, she’s got me convinced! It turned out my visit was educational too, as I learned this wonderful snippet of information: “Tradition states that if a lady loses her food into the fondue pot, she must kiss the gentleman who is sitting on her right.” Well, ladies, you have been warned… choose your seats with care at your next fondue party!

I haven’t yet shared recipes of my own but I do have a page that is dedicated to the very best Austrian chocolate. While Belgium and Switzerland are rightly famed for their chocolate, Austria too has perfected the art of chocolate making (don’t forget, it’s home to the Sachertorte). We get a small selection of my favourite Milka brand here in the UK, but it is always a treat to visit an Austria supermarket and to stand in the Milka aisle… a sea of purple chocolate bar wrappers from bite-sized to the giant bars of a chocoholic’s dreams. I’ve vowed to try every flavour but I still have some way to go.

If I did a quick poll here of everyone’s top 5 sources of everyday happiness, I’m willing to bet good money that pets would be way up there. No matter how hard the trials of the day and how self-preoccupied we feel, if we have a cat or dog in our life we can be sure of a warm welcome. The look of mute understanding and acceptance in a pair of shining eyes, the warmth of a trusting soul nestling against us.

Of course, cats and dogs are not the only animals that can bring us joy and companionship. All animals are precious and wonderful to me, large and small. I know I’m not alone in this. Neither am I about to launch a cats vs. dogs debate. Both can be perfect companions, it all depends on what kind of person you are and how well that matches the temperament of your choice of pet. Personally, cats suit my personality, though I am sure the dog that could win me over exists out there somewhere.

In any case, it is cats that I want to dedicate this blog post to today. These beautiful and loving creatures have always had a special place in my life, and in the lives of many of you. Writer LindaJM, whose descriptive writing contest I was so delighted to win, is also an animal lover who shares her life with 4 cats and a dog. Her Squidoo webpage Black Cats Need Adoptive Homes was, as I well remember, one of the very first Squidoo pages that I can across as a new member on the site. It’s no surprise to those of you familiar with Linda and her work that this is both a beautifully-written and exceptionally well-presented page. We’d expect that from an author who also is well-known to many for her stunning photography and who is the Squidoo Image and Video Mentor. However, her page on black cats also highlights an important message. I was upset to learn from it that black cats are often overlooked when people choose a cat or kitten. It seems many want a cat with pretty markings.

It’s an idea that is so very human. And brings me right back to both my own point and perhaps even more so to that made by Carol in her blogpost today, where she wrote that, with pets, there is no need for any image. Animals will love us, whether we have ‘pretty markings’ that win admiration, or looks that only a mother could love. They don’t even care what cat we drive, or how much money we earn. Animals see past all that crap. How sad that we can’t do the same.

To borrow a quote from Linda’s lens, written by Admiral Glass about black cats: “I mean they are just as loving and prrrrring than any other coloured cat.”

By the way, because I an angered by this attitude of animals as accessories and don’t want to end on a sour note… let me point you at some ‘animals’ which DO make purrfect accessories for your home. And that’s the wonderful glass clocks of the above-mentioned Admiral Glass. I don’t know Paul but was delighted to come across his fantastic Cat clocks with pendulum tail some time ago. They really are amazing, so much so that Squidoo’s JaguarJulie commissioned one. It’s on his lens, so go take a look! And if you simply must have a cat with ‘pretty markings’, maybe this is the way to go?

But if your heart is big enough, please don’t forget black cats, or white ones either.

If you’ve read the tagline for this blog, you may wonder if I leap out of bed every day with a smile on my face, ready to seize upon all those ‘everyday moments of happiness’ that come my way. Not a bit of it! Some days, all it seems my mind will focus on is ridiculous worries and imagined obstacles. Especially at this time of year, when I begin to suffer from a chronic lack of sunshine. Looking for the bright spots in life is a habit I have to work hard at. I often fail.

Of course, when you are not keeping your focus on what’s good about life, it’s hard to keep your focus on doing all the things that support those everyday pleasures. So the blog and the other web projects stop getting the attention they deserve, or fall by the wayside. Which adds another link to the vicious circle as you lose the habit of being productive and creative — a habit which, after all, is often in itself the source of much of your everyday happiness.

The best way to break out of that circle is to do it as soon as you can. Now, if you are caught in such a vicious circle of inactivity you probably need a good dose of motivation to inspire you to action. I know I do.

I should have known MiMi would be just the woman for that job! Her Motivational Success Quotes were full of the short but punchy advice I needed to get back on track. I can see I’ll be heading back to this great resource time and again.

Of course, knowing how to help yourself out of a pit of inactivity is essential. But sometimes life steps in and gives you an unexpected boost. I got one today. I was the winner of LindaJM’s 2009 Descriptive Writing Contest, which she ran on Squidoo last year. I remember entering and having a lot of fun with the picture prompts, but that was some months ago now and it was a wonderful surprise to get the email from Linda today.

I am a harsh self-critic, and not only am I proud of this win, but it gives me an incentive to keep on writing and creating. And to just have fun with it. Sure beats sitting around feeling sorry for myself.

A very important lens of Linda’s will be the feature of my next blog post.

This part of the winter can be gloomy — the Christmas cheer is over and spring still seems a long way off. Here in Scotland the snow has finally gone but skies are grey and I’m beginning to forget what sunshine feels like. That’s why I’ve been on the hunt for ways to get the most out of this season without spending a fortune.

Deb (known to many of us as ‘Ramkitten’) is full of ideas for enjoying the cold weather. This hardy hiker doesn’t let cold days keep her captive indoors. She’s more likely to be donning a pair of sturdy boots and some snuggly fleece clothing before heading off into the wild. I’ve just been reading Starting An Appalachian Trail Thru-Hike on New Years Day where she pays tribute to the hikers who have set out on the challenging Appalachian Trail route in the heart of winter. This is a beautiful presentation of the advantages (and disadvantages) of winter hiking, with plenty of true-life tales for those eager to be inspired. It certainly inspired me, if only to daydream. It seems I love my home comforts a little too much.

All the same, one thing I do like about the cold weather is that it gives me a chance to rediscover some wonderful soups. My favourite thing about soup is how easy it is to make, and with simple, inexpensive ingredients too. I rarely follow a recipe but just use what I’ve got to hand, and yet it rarely disappoints. However, I am sorely tempted to try this Vegetarian French Onion Soup. It looks both easy and delicious. There’s even a fun video on how to cut an onion without tears!

There might not be any sun in my sky, but it’s amazing how a warm bowl of soup can make the day seem brighter. Guess what I’m having for lunch today?

I Capture The Castle - a captivating novel

You could be forgiven for thinking I had wandered into the fascinating world of Eva’s paranormal blog here. While I am talking about other-worldly beings, these ones live between pages.

Throughout my life, one of the most consistent sources of happiness and indeed comfort to me has been my favorite books and the characters that reside within them. I have always had a book by my side, or two, or more. You might even call me a compulsive reader. There are few things I love as much as getting hooked by a new discovery and getting to know new fictional people.

But one thing that beats even that thrill is the time spent with an old friend of the fictional kind. I have just finished re-reading one of my all-time favorite novels,
I Capture The Castle. If you haven’t heard of it, you are in the majority. To an uninformed bookstore browser, it would be easy to miss it, or to dismiss it as a novel for teen girls, and written too many years ago to be relevant. Yet those who know the book seem to love it with as much passion as I do.

This is one of the most captivating reads I have ever come across in the countless novels I have read. Despite being told through the voice of a young woman who is criticised by another character as ‘consciously naive’, the book is one that writers will love. (The endorsement on the front cover by J.K. Rowling proves my point nicely.) Coming back to the book as an adult, I appreciate the subtle skill with which the author lets us experience a life-changing year through the eyes of a sharp-witted and hugely likeable young adult.

I could talk about this novel all day but the only way to befriend it is to read it. And Cassandra Mortmain is a friend well worth making, especially if you remember what it was to be a sensitive but impulsive young woman trying to make sense of the world, or if you know someone who fits that description. The book is set in England in the 1930s, which adds a charm of its own, but Cassandra remains as real as any modern-day character as she searches for her own place in the world.

My review of this book and the film adaptation is currently in SquidLit where it is teetering on the edge at number 100. I only hope I can persuade a few others to discover this hidden gem of English literature.